It's a New Day…

Day 219 Question 219:

How do you know when to end a friendship/relationship?

 I am the type of person that will hold on with dear life to my relationships.  Even through the hardest of times I will hold onto friendships and relationships because I hate the thought of losing people in my life.  Since gaining some wisdom in my adult years, I have learned that it is inevitable that people are going to come in and out of your life at a rapid pace.  There will be times when more people exit your life than you could imagine and those are the times that feel the hardest because it bruises you.  It makes you feel at fault….doubting yourself and wondering what you did wrong or what you could have done differently.  There are times in my past that the loss of friendships or relationships were undoubtedly my fault.  At the age of 33 I have learned that the only thing I can do is take ownership, mend any open wounds and move forward.

I have always been the type to believe that relationships (of any form) should just be completely natural and I even (maybe being a little naïve) thought that work was unnecessary if it was a real relationship.  I am learning that work is necessary in all things if we want to learn and in relationships it is a continual learning process.  Last night I watched the Oprah and Rihanna interview and of course, they discussed the incident in which Rihanna was beat up by Chris Brown.  In the interview Rihanna told Oprah that she forgave Chris Brown and she did still love him.  Of course, the majority of people watching probably gasped in absolute shock.  The way she explained herself though, I found to be beautiful.  Chris Brown (even though I find him to be a total douche) is someone she knew on a very personal level….on a level that most people did not know him.  After the incident occurred, she felt angry and betrayed and deeply hurt but her immediate thought was that she wanted him to get help.  She didn’t want to harm him or live with a hatred inside herself toward him.  She knew there was a deep rooted issue within him that needed to be dug out and she knew he needed help.  She didn’t open herself up to him right away but after a good bit of time, she slowly began a friendship with him again.  I struggled watching this because I was unsure of where my feelings were lying.  It is easy as an outsider to hate this person for his actions but like I said, I am an outsider.  We don’t know the ins and outs of every person’s relationships so judgment should be minimal.  People are going to give us hell for our decisions no matter what….but it is the decision of each one of us individually on whether or not to continue or cut off a relationship/friendship.

So, what is the last straw?  I am not the type of person to just speak immediately with hatred or curse someone to the death.  People are destined to make mistakes (even big ones).  Everything is dependent on how people handle those mistakes.  For me, I am willing to forgive but I admit to having a hard time forgetting and if someone repeats the same mistakes over and over again then that is the time I know I need to walk away.  I want to help people if I can but I can’t help people that don’t want to help themselves.  I believe this is why I lost people in my life in the past….I was doing nothing to help myself and people grew sick of it.  Right now I am at a point in my life where I see how fast life passes us by and how time marches on at an insane pace so I have decided to negate those people in my life that serve no beneficial purpose.  I know that may sound selfish but I find it important to surround myself with people that will help me learn and grow and people that I genuinely enjoy being around.  This benefits me and hopefully I am able to benefit them in the same way.  I see no point in maintaining relationships anymore with people that continually complain about bitch about their circumstances when they are fully capable of changing them.  I know so many girls that whine and complain about how they aren’t good enough or no guys like them or their job is just so awful….well I can only give my advice so many times before I must decide to walk away from the negativity.  I have changed my life so drastically that I have learned that surround myself with chronic complainers and non-doers is just not an option anymore.  Life is full of opportunities and if others cannot see it then that if for them to deal with…not me.  Don’t get me wrong, people will have struggles and I will be there for my friends and family when they hit low points in their lives….the people I speak of are the ones that are continually living in the low points….the people that can never see the silver lining (or just outright refuse to).

Romantic relationships I struggle a little bit more with.  I have not had a long-term relationship in over 5 years and the last one I was in was just plain ugly.  I stayed in a verbally abusive relationship for way longer than I ever should have and by the time all was said and done, I was broken and completely lost in life.  This relationship has been (thus far) the biggest and most important learning experience of my life.  I have come to learn though that in the quest to protect myself from this kind of abuse and harm ever again, I have shut myself off from pretty much all men.  I admit (and I am not proud of this) that I tend to believe all men are going to disappoint and hurt me…even before I give them a chance….even before I know them.  This is an area I need to fix in my life.  Taking chances is one of the best adventures in life…even if it does mean getting hurt from time to time.  Falling down does not necessarily have to be the worst thing in life….because the getting back up stronger than you were before makes it so well worth it.  This is the hardest battle I fight at this point in my life.  This is my place of imbalance.  It is something I am aware of but have a hard time changing.  I hold onto certain things that I know I need to let go of because the past is the past and now is now.  I assume the worst before anything even happens and I think this radiates off me and causes relationship failures.  I believe you get what you put out there and in this department I tend to be a cynic.  I am progressing though and awareness is the first step…baby steps if you will.

I believe friendships and relationships are worth fighting for because we have so much to learn from each other.  I do not believe in walking away after one argument or one mishap but there comes a time in life when you know what is good for you and what is not.  Life moves so fast and it truly is not worth holding onto things that do not make you feel your absolute best.  We can help people in life but we should not have to try to change people so they will fit us.  It is ok that there are people out there that we do not want to befriend or those we need to let go of.  Letting go does not need to be done out of hatred….just out of self-bettering.

Day 218 Question 218:

What are your thoughts on children’s beauty pageants?

I will be honest and say that children’s beauty pageants absolutely disgust me.  I don’t look down on the children or blame them for anything.  The only thing that is represented when it comes to these beauty pageants is bad parenting.  I cannot wrap my brain around how a parent could exploit their child in such a way.  I do not know what these pageants entail but what I want to know is what is being taught to these young girls.  If you look at these young girls they have layers of makeup caked on their faces and their hair teased and hair sprayed so high that they can barely hold their head up straight.  Many of these young girls wear false eyelashes and fake nails…I have even read stories of a mother that injected her young daughter with botox.  Why would any parent want this for their child?

Lately, there has been all kinds of talk about this little girl nicknamed Honey Boo Boo Child.  She first became known in the public eye when she was on a show called Toddlers and Tiaras (which shows how desperate we are for entertainment).  This little girl was drinking concoctions of Mountain Dew and Red Bull that were given to her by her own mother.  This little girl was sassy and defiant and her family found it to be all very amusing.  Because of her behaviors on the Toddlers and Tiaras show, she was given her own reality show.  Seriously?????  This is what entertainment has come down to.  We find it entertaining to watch trashy people (sorry but that is the truth) destroy a child’s life.  This child does not understand how unhealthy this lifestyle is.  Her parents are using her to make a quick buck.  This ride to fame is only going to be a short one for Honey Boo Boo Child….then what????  I just find the whole thing to be absolutely disgusting.

I may be being harsh but I am such a nurturer and I believe it is vital to teach children about natural beauty.  Yes, I believe that people should take pride in the way that they look but I don’t think it is healthy to give children a warped perception of beauty.  I don’t think any child should be forced into high heels and nylons and layers of makeup when they are that young.  We are already living in a society where a majority of young girls and women have a self-image complex….pageants like this are going to make the problem even worse.  As a society, we need to start being a little more realistic when it comes to outside appearance.  The average woman is between a size 12-14….which is not HUGE like society portrays.  I have watched several episodes of America’s Next Top Model and the plus-size models that they feature are about a size 8 or 10 and their weight is continually criticized.  REALLY?????  How did we ever get to this place and why would we teach our young children that outside beauty is of the utmost importance.  Looks eventually fade (and will fade even quicker the more plastic you become)….so what is there to fall back on?

I don’t have all of the answers in life….hell I don’t really have any….I merely have opinions.  I believe people can do whatever they choose but when it comes to pageants, I think it is important to go into it with an open and healthy mindset.  I am actually unsure of what the point of this contests really is….young girls and women are crowned as the most beautiful in their state or their country or even the world but who really decides what beauty is??  I have heard many people comment about someone being beautiful and I would disagree with them.  I do know that there is more than just looks in this competitions but dressing up a child like they were a doll and caking makeup on their faces is just not natural.  I believe that a parent that does this is taking away a childhood that is much needed.  I sometimes believe that parents are living vicariously through their children…pushing them into a life that they never had.  Life should not be a competition but it is in all aspects…sports, politics, beauty, school, etc.  Everyone wants to be better than everyone else.  I don’t know if I want children but if I do have them I would do everything to teach them that people are equal and that winning does not equal success.  Life is the journey not the outcome.  In high school we all had different clicks and so many people longed to be part of the “popular” crowd.  Well, if you have made your way out of high school you have learned very quickly that that entire crowd has now bearing on your life and their status in high school is most likely not following them into their adult lives.  Status and winning is only important in a moment but it is the experience that should be made to value.

Custody at Risk After ‘Toddlers & Tiaras’ Star Wears Controversial Outfit

The woman who dressed her young daughter as Dolly Parton – complete with a padded bra and sculpting underwear – for a child beauty pageant that aired on TLC’s “Toddlers & Tiaras” could lose custody of the girl after her estranged husband claimed she sexually exploited their daughter by allowing her to dress so provocatively.

Little Maddy Verst’s appearance in the costume on an episode of the controversial TLC program sparked a firestorm of criticism against her mother, Lindsay.

Her father, Bill Verst, has asked a Kentucky court to grant him sole custody of his daughter, who is now 6.

During a court proceeding Saturday, a judge threw reporters out of the courtroom, closed the hearing and placed a gag order on mother Lindsay Jackson. The judge also imposed a ban on any pageant activity for Maddy or her mother for the duration of the trial.

A court-appointed psychologist has sided with Maddy’s father, condemning the Parton costume and recommending that a judge make Verst the girl’s sole custodial parent.

Jackson said the costume was never meant to be sexual and that she shouldn’t be at risk of losing her daughter.

If the judge grants Verst’s petition because Maddy did pageants with her mother, “then that opens the door for any parent to challenge anybody on any activity that a kid does, period,” Jackson told FOXNews.com.

Jackson dressed her daughter herself in the Dolly Parton costume, telling the TLC show’s cameras, “When she wears the fake boobs and the fake butt, it’s just like an added extra bonus and it’s really funny when she comes out on stage and everybody thinks it’s hysterical.”

Not everybody thought it was hysterical, however. Some online commenters were quick to express their disgust for the costume and for the perceived sexualization of little girls on the show.

It’s not the first time a pageant mother has come under fire on the show.

Wendy Dickey was condemned for dressing her 3-year-old daughter, Paisley, in a racy costume that mimicked the outfit worn by Julia Roberts’ prostitute character from the movie “Pretty Woman.”

The costume consisted of a fitted, skin-baring white blouse, tight blue mini-skirt and thigh-high, shiny black boots. Paisley wore it all – complete with a blond wig, which Roberts’ prostitute character also wore – and critics and children’s advocates erupted in outrage.

The court proceedings in Maddy’s custody case resume Aug. 31.

Day 217 Question 217:

Are you a dog or cat person?

Day 216 Question 216:

Who are you at your best?  Your worst?

The question Who Am I? floats through my head day in and day out.  I know I am not my job or my body.  Who I am goes so far deeper than that.  I believe I am what I feel.  I am the soul inside of me that is always feeling what is right…at least right for me.  I am the soul that looks for the natural state of being….my place of personal comfort.  So who am I at my best and at my worst?

It is easy to determine who I am at my worst.  I am the person that self-loathes.  The person that stops seeing the positive and believes the negative thoughts of self.  At my worst I am the self-hater and the non-believer.  I live in a state of panic and worry because I let me ego control me.  I believe that all walls are closing in on me and my sanity is dwindling.  At my worst I torture myself.

It has been a long time since I have been at my worst.  I am so aware of the power of the ego now that I fight it every time I feel it coming on.  Being able to do just that is me at my best.  I have been at my best for many months now because I have given up the anger and have destroyed all of the pain and resentment that had been bottled up inside of me.  I came to be at my best when I realized that those feelings served absolutely no purpose and they not only hurt me but hurt the people around me.  I verbally abused my mother for many years because of my bottled up hatred of self (myself at my worst).  I was angry at everything and it took very little to set me off.  The idea of screaming at my mother in that way again makes me cringe.  Myself at my best was the day that I apologized for ever treating her like that and for letting her know that she was not at fault for all of my problems (I had placed the blame on her a lot).  She has mentioned to me several times how different of a person I have become….so much more calm and kind.  It kind of saddens me to think of how I had been acting but the past is the past for a reason.  I cannot dwell on it, I can simply learn from it and choose to change for the better instead of the worst and that is exactly what I have been doing.  It took learning simple concepts and coming into my own understanding and perception of the world that made me change who I was.  It was the learning about the ego and what control it can have over us and the acceptance of self even at its worse that made me a better person both mentally and physically.  Life has been the most amazing over the past 12 months….because I now see through different eyes.  Myself at my best is the person that does not stop believing and pushes herself harder and harder.

I love how far I have come in life….I love this place in my journey.  I still have doubts sometimes and not every day is sunny but that no longer bothers me.  I love that if I would have answered this question a year ago the answer would be predominately negative and self-loathing but today, the answer focuses on me at my best.  Simple concepts and the seeking of knowledge have changed me and have made me enjoy the journey of life….there is no more truth that happiness is a journey not a destination.  Once I learned that and truly accepted those words everything changed and the best me destroyed the worst me.

Day 215 Question 215:

What do you think others think of you/about you?  Does it matter?  Are these really things you think of yourself?

Do you ever wonder about how other people perceive you?  Not necessarily that you care or that their perceptions hold any true value in your life….but just out of curiosity, how people see you and perceive you when you are in the same vicinity (even when you are not).  Do you wonder whether their perceptions or the true you or the altered you in their mind?  This all sounds weird I know but I do think about it a great deal.  Every day I know how I feel and what I am thinking and I believe I convey those things to others but I do wonder whether they are able to absorb it in the manner in which I want them to.

I am not made of stone so of course I care what others think about me…sometimes I care a little bit too much.  That is just a part of who I am though….it has been for as long as I can remember.  There are people though that just spark my interest and my curiosity leads me to wonder how I am perceived in their eyes.  These are people that I may have very minimal contact with….these are people (to be honest) that I may have just virtual relationships with.

Last night when I finished work (after work 16 hours between both jobs) I stopped into the gas station near my house to get something to fulfill my sweet craving.  The man that was working there was probably in his 80’s and I had the urge to reach over the counter and just hug him (I refrained).  He didn’t say much more than hello, my total and told me to have a nice night but he had this aura about him that made me see him as the adorable grandfather type…that really cute old man that just melts your heart.  I started to think about perception in that moment and realized I could be totally wrong about this man….what I was seeing and who he really is could be two very different people.  I then wondered how people perceived me, especially from first encounters.

I admit to sometimes assuming that people are thinking the worst about me and internally judging me.  I wondered whether my thinking this was how I was viewing myself…I sure hope not.  I just believe that sometimes my nerves get in the way and I just automatically assume the worse.  I think it is somewhat of a defense mechanism.  By doing this I keep expectations on the lower end then a lot of people will happily surprise me.  I realize it is not exactly the best coping mechanism though…..I really do want to believe that people are ultimately nice and see me in a positive light for the most part.  I guess my curiosity just goes into overdrive sometimes.  I get curious about how I am conveying my actions and whether people are understanding them the way that I want them to be.  I drive myself crazy sometimes by overanalyzing things like this….I wonder if people view me as annoying or just overly sensitive or whether I do or say things that just bother people????  I also wonder if people are able to feel my passion when I speak in my animated fashion….I wonder if people are able to pick up on my senses?  I do believe some are but I also believe that others are not.  I find it interesting because to me, it is in moments like these when you learn about people having a genuine connection.  There are people that I am around and it is as if I can feel how they are feeling…maybe it is because of the way they are conveying their thoughts and feelings.  It is a very beautiful thing.  On the other hand though, there are others that I feel no connection with.  I will always treat people nicely and with respect but the connection is nonexistent…we are unable to meet on the same page.

Today was just a rambling of words and thoughts.  My life is in a constant state of personal and societal examination….I have a love/hate relationship with this.  It allows my mind to be more open though and I do love that.

Day 214 Question 214:

Why is there so much war in the world?  Is it because of religion?  Money? Media?

War is such an ugly thing.  War is just one large battle of a whole bunch of egos.  I understand so many points of view when it comes to war but I just can’t wrap my brain around its origination or why anyone thinks that it solves anything.  I have never heard a more true statement than: An Eye for an Eye Makes the Whole World Blind.  I guess I am just confused as to why masses of people have grown to believe that war is going to solve the world’s problems.  I can say with strong conviction that this will never be the case.  Call me naïve if you will but war is without a doubt not the answer.  I admire the men and women that risk their lives fighting for our countries freedoms and not for one second do I take what they do for granted….I see it as something way more brave than anything I would be able to do.  The people that serve are the most honorable people in the world because they take such pride in their country.  These people shouldn’t have to do this though…war should not be an option….but since as long as we can all remember…war has become the norm in life.

So what is the cause of all of these wars that are going on in far too many parts of the world?  Of  course religion plays a part in the division of people and the cause of them retaliating against each other.  Religion is this beautiful concept and idea that (I believe) should bring us together but unfortunately it drives us further and further apart.  How beautiful is it to live in a world with such a variety of beliefs in creation and a higher power.  Instead of embracing each other’s beliefs, we point fingers and tell people that they are wrong.  We retaliate and tell people that God is this or God is that.  Why can’t we allow people to have their beliefs and just listen to them….take in what they have to say.  People do not necessarily want you to believe in what they do….they just want to be heard.  What is causing war is the human ego.  We have become all self-absorbed and believe that our way is right that we stopped even listening to what others have to say.  If only we took the time to listen and allowed people to express their feelings…we might just see a little bit more peace in the world.  Call me a dreamer if you must but Jimi Hendrix spoke such truth when he said: “When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”  It should be that simple but because of our societal training it is not….it is something that must be worked on day in and day out.  It is unfortunately more difficult for some to let go of their power.  We, as a society (myself included), are so quick to judge and so quick to assume….we don’t ask the necessary questions.  By simply asking why someone thinks or feels the way that they do…we could open up many doors for understanding why people act and think as they do.  Everyone in the world has their own story and has gone through their own journey in life and it is so easy to negate people from our lives because we don’t relate to them….that does not mean that they don’t experience the same human emotions that we do.  I truly believe that everyone has a soft, compassionate side but for some this side is masked and hidden behind what they have been taught throughout life….some people are unable to break through the hard shell because they believe if they do that they will be considered weak.  Now can you see how the ego is leading us into mass chaos???  We are allowing others to control out actions and our thoughts and we are allowing the negative to outweigh the positive.

There are so many factors that play into the human ego….money, power, media, etc.  These are all of the tools that drive people to forget about doing for humanity and instead doing for oneself all of the time.  I have always said that life is this great balancing act and most people are off-balance.  That is not an insult (because I fall into that category too).  It takes realizing that you are off balance to make the necessary changes and to be able to see life outside of just yourself.  So much beauty comes from simply learning about others.  People have told me that I sometimes ask too many questions or I am too nosey….I will allow them to think that.  I ask the questions because I want a better understanding of others….to see them for their worth and what they are offering to the world….not see them from a preconceived judgment.  I am not saying that all that I speak of is easy….trust me, through personal experience I know it is not.  There is work involved.  Even the Dalai Lama must work to maintain balance and inner peace in his life….that is why he meditates and prays every day.  He knows it is these things that help him achieve the inner peace.  That is the same reason I meditate.  If I skip meditating for just one day, I feel a great difference in my mood.  I find it so much easier to become annoyed and irritated at the little things.  When I meditate I allow the stress of the world to slowly drift away and I am constantly shocked how easy it is to let things go….to not allow the ego to control me….or the outside circumstances to play me like a puppet.

War is such an ugly thing and there are so many people in the world that find it to be a necessity because of how our society has evolved.  Maybe they are right….maybe the hole has been dug so deep that there is no longer any chance for repair so why not just fight to the death.  I have a really hard time believing that to be the truth though.  I write in hopes that people will read my words and allow themselves to look within but also look outside of themselves.  It is never easy to admit our faults or see ourselves as anything negative (trust me…again I know from personal experience).  This has been a year that I have finally looked at myself for who I was and realized the damage I was not only doing to myself but the damage I was doing to others.  I realized that if I didn’t make a change I was just going to be a statistic that was a part of the problem….I could not bear the thought of that.  I could not continue to live in this world of denial.  I knew how I had been acting and I needed to take ownership for my wrongdoings and my behaviors and I needed to change them.  Easy?  Absolutely Not!  Necessary?  More than one can even imagine!  With the changes came the ability to see and feel myself and the world through such different eyes.

There are many factors that play a part when it comes to war but the main cause of war is undoubtedly the human ego.  People can tell me I am wrong until they are blue in the face but when you take the time to think about what damage the human ego can do…I believe that you will see that it is the ultimate source for destruction.  It is the thing that crushes us as human beings and controls our thoughts and actions day in and day out.

Day 213 Question 213:

Is there a time frame for love?  Can people be in love in just a short amount of time or is more time necessary to determine whether or not two people are truly in love?  How do we know?

Am I a skeptic because I am unsure whether true love really exists?  I mean, if you have been reading any of my stuff you know that I question pretty much everything in the entire world.  Why would I stop at questioning the validity of true love???  I guess I just sometimes wonder if people are truly “meant” to be together.  Don’t get me wrong, I admire strong, loving couples but I sometimes wonder if they enjoy each other so greatly that they decide to build a life together….but are they truly “meant” to be together.  I feel that those people that are “meant” to be together…those so-called “soul-mates” are very few and far between.  I think distance and life circumstances keeps people apart which inevitably draws us into those that surround us in this very moment.  I don’t find any harm in this…I am just always curious of answers….of the ultimate answers in life….the meanings and the purposes.

I posed this question because it seems as of lately I have encountered people that have become wrapped up in brand new relationships and within a very short amount of time the words I Love You are being beckoned out of the mouths of both parties.  After only one month of knowing someone, is it possible to love someone?  I mean, as far as I know, love does not come with a set of rules or guidelines….but I admit that I have some skepticism when believing that people knowing each other for such a short period of time can TRULY love each other.  I am proven wrong all of the time though.  I say this because there have been people in my life for several years that I am still learning about and with some, I have found that over time I loss any fondness toward them because our lives did not feel in sync.  I have also felt the opposite….I have grown to admire and love others because they have opened up and shown me how beautiful they are.  Love is a guessing game….time is the only answer.  I believe this is why our divorce rate is so high…people think they know someone but time shows them a completely different person…and they do not like this person enough to continue this legal union.

I am not knocking love in any which way.  I am a HUGE believer in love in all forms.  I believe in love because I personally define it….love cannot be defined for the whole.  There are just certain expressions and ideas that I question (I said question….I did not say they were wrong).  I wonder what the guidelines for being “meant to be together” entail.  Who decides this?  I guess I sit here and wonder how people have such strong convictions when there is so much I don’t know…there is no proof that these things are actually true.  I have always wondered how some people have whole-heartedly believed in things without question while I sit here asking why why why????  I admire people with these convictions but I am unable to understand them because I am unable to relate.  There has been nothing that I have been able to believe in fully without have evidence or proof put in front of me.

The majority of us drive ourselves absolutely crazy just waiting for Mr. or Mrs. Right to walk into our lives.  We may not like to admit it but it seems to be the end all be all….the thing that drives us to get through everyday….it feels almost like the purpose of life.  I admit to being one of these dreamers…not every day but too many days that I would like to admit to.  With the idea of love comes the idea of comfort.  There is comfort in knowing that someone is waiting for you at the end of the day….wanting to talk to you and spend time with you….comfort in knowing you are not alone.  Whether soulmates or people that are “meant to be together” is a reality….it really doesn’t matter.  Love is what you want it to be.  For me, I really don’t want to put guidelines on something that should be absolutely natural.  Honestly, this is why I am so unsure of marriage.  I don’t believe that love should involve a whole bunch of people and a whole bunch of signed documents….these things do not prove love (this is not being said to insult anyone that chooses marriage—the freedom of choice is the beauty in life).  Love is truly simple.  At least that is what I think.  There is a lot I do not know or understand or 100% believe when it comes to love so therefore I choose what I want to believe…as I do with most things.  This way of thinking has its strengths and weaknesses in life but it is my way of doing things….my way of being myself to the fullest.

Day 212 Question 212:

Where have you found inspiration?

I return to this question a lot.  It is without a doubt my favorite question to answer because there is SO much to find inspiration in.  I admit to not tuning into the Olympics this year.  I am not much of a sports person and with the little free time I had I was at the gym working on my jogging skills to prepare myself for my first ever 5k or I had my nose buried in books.  I do catch the morning news on occasion and I kept hearing all of this hype over an ad put out by Nike during the Olympics that featured a 200 pound boy running up a road and the narrator speaks that greatness comes in all shapes and sizes.  I was shocked to find out that people were speaking negatively about this ad, insinuating the Nikes was poking fun at this young boy.  I found great inspiration in this ad…as I am sure many people young and old did.

I have to say that I love the direction that Nike takes then they develop their advertisements.  When people think of Nike, there is this immediate image of people with athletic bodies…the perfect athlete.  Yes, Nike does feature these people in their campaigns but they also feature the “average, everyday Joe”….they feature the child soldier from Africa that pursued his dreams to become an Olympic runner or the 200lb boy that has decided to make a healthy change in his life…and even the woman that says “Screw what everyone else says my body should look like…I want to be healthy”.  It is very inspirational to see such a HUGE brand take on the issues of the world and not only promote physical health but also emotional health.  Nike does not market to just a small group of people and that is a breath of fresh air.

I am inspired by a multimillion dollar company that is able to appeal to the entire population instead of just some small sub-populations.  I am inspired that they do not focus on always picking the people with the perfect bodies or the perfect lives for their ads.  Nike tells the stories of their consumers….the journey to GREATNESS!!

I do not know the ins and outs of the Nike corporation.  I am simply going by what I have been exposed to.  Inspiration for me comes in endless forms.  It is inspiring to see a 12 year old boy take the bull by the horns and decide to change his life (to a healthier lifestyle).  I love to see the “underdog” succeed or beat the odds.  I love to see the kid that was told he can’t his/her entire life prove to the world that he/she CAN and will!!!  I am so inspired by the people that makes mistakes and own up to them or the people that may not have made the best choices but are choosing to turn their lives around.  It is very easy for someone to criticize people for their behaviors but it seems so much harder for them to praise the people when they make changes for the better.  I have experienced this first-hand.  Who I am in comparison to who I was are two completely different people and a lot of people still see me for who I was and not who I am in this very moment.  That is ok though because it is me that knows the improvements and the changes in my life to make each day just a little bit better.  After watching this 12 year old boy on the Nike ad, I never saw a little boy that was fat and lazy…I saw a little boy that was determined to make a change.  That is a very beautiful thing…especially at that age when kids can be so cruel.  He did something that was inevitably going to get him ridicule and after watching him on 2 talk shows I was impressed how he chose to continually fight for what he believed in….bettering his health.  I love the expression: Always stand up for what you believe in even if that means standing alone!  I am inspired by children/teens all of the time…the children/teens that do what they can to better their lives but also the children/teens that choose acts of selflessness.  Nothing is more beautiful than to see a young person serve others without the expectation of anything in return.

Day 211 Question 211:

What is your mission(s) in life?

I have worked in nonprofit for several years and in every organization that I worked for there was always a mission statement….the goal of the organization.  As individuals I believe we all should have a mission…if not more than just one.  We hear the question over and over again about what our purpose in life is.  Sometimes I have feelings of what my purpose if but I think it is another one of those unanswerable questions.  Our mission though is our decision.  If we decide as individuals to set out on a mission of any form we decide the path we want to take.  I have several missions in life.

I have been a person that lives for art and that has this creative mind that is constantly running and running and running.  If I had more spare time on my hands I would dedicate a majority of it to new creations.  My first mission in life is to build on this creativity and to explore more into my artistic self.  By exploring this creativity I continue to find myself and there is nothing more beautiful.  Just this morning as I was getting ready to head to work the thought crossed my mind of how I am finally in a place where I am at peace with who I am.  That is a very broad statement but I realized in that moment that I am finally exploring the things in life that I had been neglecting and I have found what I stand for and what I believe in.  I have had this self-discovery through my creative endeavors.  Just through this blog alone I have learned so much more about myself.  To pose a question to yourself each and every day you learn so much about what your convictions are and where you stand on the issues in your life and in the world around you.  I speak of finding myself like I have been lost (in some ways I have) but what I truly believe is that we each have these layers that we need to peel away so we can discover more about who we are as individuals.  For a long time I never got beyond the surface layer and I realized how shallow that level really was.  The excitement and awe come from peeling back each layer and discovering the parts you didn’t know existed….the you that has been hiding.

My mission in life is to find acceptance of the good as well as the bad.  I say this very loosely.  Everything in life is going to happen the way that it is meant to (at least that is what I believe).  We are unable to predict our next moment.  Life is a series of natural events…moments happening one after another.  It is easy to accept the good in life….to enjoy the moments of happiness with loved ones and new experiences that are absolutely exhilarating.  It is the bad moments that we have a hard time accepting because we tend to ask ourselves what we could have done differently.  The answer is nothing because the moment has passed.  Living a life of regret is not worth living.  There is nothing easy about accepting murder or child abuse or anything of the sort….but it must be accepted (do not mistake me saying this as being accepted in a positive way…accepted in a way that is unfortunately become a part of humanity and life as a whole…things that have become too normal) and the only thing that can be done is focusing on what can be done right here and right now.  Mistakes and bad (sometimes horrible) decisions are inevitable but there is ALWAYS room for change and to make better decisions in this very moment.  This is something I have a difficult time with…in certain aspects of my life.  I have a hard time accepting my body for what it is and accepting who I am 100%.  I let my ego get in the way and take control.  I have learned just in this past year of what damage the ego can do to a person (what damage it has done to me).  Being unable to accept yourself and accept what is going around you can be pure torture….without it even being realized by most.  Our ego is what makes us angry and depressed and it is in these moments when we are being controlled….we are allowing our egos to string us around like puppets.  As silly as it sounds, it is the one truth I believe in whole-heartedly.  It is not an easy concept to grasp and not allowing your ego to control you is probably the most difficult task in your life (and it is something that must be continuously worked on) but when you do, you are able to see life in such a different, beautiful life.  You have this ability to accept yourself and to accept the world around you….even the bad.  It gives you a drive (well at least it does me) to inspire those around you and show them what a life without ego control could truly be like.  I, honestly believe, the world would be a much more peaceful place if people worked on not letting the ego control them….but in order for this to happen, people must accept the ego for what it is and make the effort each and every day to not let the ego take the reins.  Call me a dreamer if you like and I will show you a person that smiles and laughs way more than cries or spends days bottled up with anger.  It is a simple concept that people have a hard time accepting (which I understand) but once they do….a weight is lifted….life becomes so very different.

I went a little out into left field….as usual.  When I write I talk about what just comes out of me naturally.  I talk about what I believe and what I feel in this very moment.  My missions in life are endless and a majority of them are to help others.  I am not looking for saint status or to have recognition for any of my missions…I just feel that my mission is to educate people that want to be educated.   I don’t have the answers to life…hell nobody does.  I have information and thoughts though that I do believe could be beneficial to society….why would I keep this all to myself?  I was never raised to be selfish and I am thankful for that every single day.  If I didn’t have to work, I would spend endless hours a day volunteering because not only do I want to educate and share my experiences….I want others to educate me.  Life is this place with this great cyclic potential and some people do not take advantage of these opportunities…I don’t want to be one of those people.  I live my life every day and I want to share it with other people but I strive more for others to share with me…to show me a world outside of anything I have ever known (whether big or small).  My mission in life is to never stop opening myself up to the opportunities for knowledge and for new experiences….to find love and beauty in different ways all of the time.

What is your mission(s) in life?

Day 210 Question 210:

Love or money?

Without question ALWAYS love…in ALL forms :0)