Day 246 Question 246:

What is your definition of a soulmate?

When I think of a “soulmate” what comes to mind is having that ease with someone.  That way of expressing yourself in a way that allows you to empty your mind of all stress and worry and having the other person accept that.  I don’t believe soulmates have to be only between two people in a romantic relationships.  Soulmates are all of those people in your life that make it so easy for you to be your total and complete self…the people that rid you of all of your self-criticizing inner demons.  With your soulmate, those inner demons no longer even exist.  I watch people in all kinds of settings and my curiosity usually gets the best of me.  I wonder about their happiness.  For those people that know me, I wonder if they wish that I am happy.

I am a person with this beautiful soul that sometimes hides away.  I sometimes stay to myself so  that I can dig deeper into myself.  That may seem weird to some but it is these moments that I have needed to find out more about who I am and what I want.  I look at the world and the way that society evolves every single day and I see so many people marching to a beat given to them by society.  I hear the clocks going tick tock tick tock but I don’t want to listen to them.  I am sick of being on society’s time frame….it puts on far too much pressure and (in my opinion) take away from the natural progression of life.

Society has defined soulmates as two people that are MEANT to be together.  I find that definition to be silly considering that the world is made up of over seven billion people.  What are the chances that you are going to find the person you are MEANT to spend the rest of your life with?  I am not trying to be a Negative Nancy, I just think society has skewed the definition and entire idea of what soulmates really are.  I just don’t think the world soul should be thrown around so loosely.  Our soul is who we truly are….soulmates are those in our lives that we connect with far beyond a superficial level.  I believe that sometimes people confuse love with soulmates.  Both are beautiful but both are very different.

I have not been in a long-term relationship in over 5 years now.  A lot of people would think that I do not have any room to speak on this topic….I mean, what could I
possibly know.  I know who I am and I know what I feel.  In moments of loneliness I cannot cave just to have the momentary fulfillment of male company (on whatever level it is).  I know exactly what love is and what a soulmate is because the definition is mine.  A long time ago I stopped listening to what society told me and what all of the books defined those terms as.  I have grown tired of listening to people tell me what is right and wrong when I walk around in this one body day in and day out….what is right for one or for some is not necessarily right for all.  Love and soulmates are two things I could never take for granted because they are the two things that mean the most to me in this world.  I have people in my life that make me feel alive strictly by being in their presence (as silly as that may sound to some).  I was chatting with a friend online and he told me to more or less dive into the dating pool because I could easily be snagged up.  He told me I was intelligent and beautiful and a man would be lucky to have me.  I knew what he was saying and the compliment was so heart-warming but I told him that in order for me to give my heart and potentially share my soul with someone that I have to be able to show vulnerability with him the same way I am able to show vulnerability here in written words.  In this blog I am completely true to my feelings and my thoughts and although they change they are as real as they get.  I have yet to find someone (romantically speaking) that I have been able to be that vulnerable with…the walls were never able to come down.  A true soulmate knows what you are feeling with no words being needed.  A true soulmate is not just a lover but a friend and a mentor and a believer of everything that you are.  I believe we all have soulmates in our lives and some of these soulmates reach a deeper level than others.

In this past year I have dove a lot deeper into my consciousness.  I have stopped letting my ego be my puppet master and control my every thought and emotion.  I have started living naturally…allowing myself to accept my feelings and my thoughts for what they are and I have realized that the negative feelings and thoughts are my ego creeping in trying to take over.  I am not society’s idea of “perfect” or beautiful but I am undoubtedly beautiful regardless of what they say.  Soulmates are those people that can appreciate the looks on the surface but would rather swim in the depths of a person’s mind and soul.