Day 92 Question 92:
In what ways has technology changed you?
So I was originally going to answer this question yesterday but yesterday ended up being this crazy cluster-f**k of chaos and I needed to write about that. This question stirred in my mind though and I knew I needed to answer it.
So, if you had a chance to read yesterdays entry (if not you really should because it’s juicy;) you know that my brand new computer pooped the bed. The hard drive completely crapped out. Luckily it is under warranty and luckily my old laptop is still functioning so I still have something to use while it is out for repair. I started thinking about how dependent on technology I have become. I am literally obsessed. I can sadly admit that I have an addiction. I feel lost without my laptop and my cell phone. Thinking that then re-reading it makes me feel pretty yucky….I mean I am not torturing myself with guilt or anything but I have come to realize how much human contact I have lost because of all of this technology (and I definitely know I am not alone in this).
Technology is a necessity…especially in this day and age (well at least in this country-in other countries it may not be something that people even really think about). We live in a society where computer knowledge is a must in order to advance. Communication with others is primarily done through text messaging. I have harped many times about how we are losing family values and relationships and human contact because of this boom in technology and I am a huge culprit that has yet to change my ways. I surf on Facebook for far too many hours a day. I have lengthy conversations with people via text. Honestly, the idea of picking up the phone and calling people almost seems awkward and uncomfortable….isn’t that crazy???? In 2000, I lived in upstate NY and was in college. I didn’t have a cell phone and I didn’t have my own personal computer….we all got through perfectly. We called each other on landlines or just stopped at each other’s apartments. Boy have times changed. I have friends that I absolutely adore but because we have spent so much time texting I feel a little bit strange thinking about picking up the phone to call them to talk.
In thinking about all of this I realized that this is another revelation of mine….I MUST STEP OUTSIDE OF MY COMFORT ZONE!!!! If I do not want to be guilty of this then I have to take the necessary steps. The one thing I loved about the “relationship” I had with the last guy I was dating is that he really wasn’t a texter…he preferred talking on the phone. It felt more natural to me and I felt more comfortable with myself and the entire situation. I feel that if I date someone I want to hear their voice….I do not want our entire conversation to happen through words on a tiny screen. We are unable to convey any sort of emotion that way. And how many times have you been completely lost in translation through this type of communication?
Don’t get me wrong…I don’t think technology is evil by any means. I guess it could be but if used properly then it can do so much good. For myself, I think (as sad as it sounds) that I have abused technology. I became a conformist when it comes to technology and I have followed the crowd….and I hate conforming!!!!
So, with this being said, I have decided to give myself a challenge. I will have to still use my laptop for school work and of course to continue with this blog but I am going to limit my time. I am going to allot myself only a small amount of time everyday for Facebook or other social media-esque sites. I will use the Internet for good….to learn more :0) I have also decided to limit my texting everyday. I cannot shut my phone off during the day in case my boss needed me for an emergency but I am going to try my hardest to shut my phone off every night from probably 7:30-10 and just spend that time with no technology (unless I have school work). I want to use my time for reading more and actually writing with a pen and paper. And where I am currently living the weather is beautiful 95% of the year…I want to be outside. There is no excuse not to be outside or doing things that bring me to a peaceful place. So starting today the challenge is on!
I wanted to include an interesting article I found on the subject as well (find it below). And btw…are you addicted to technology (honestly)?
Relationships And Technology: Is Texting Ruining Romance?
“Can’t do this anymore. It’s over. You’re a fantastic woman — but I’m not the man for you. Call me?”
This is the way that The Daily Mail’s Mandy Appleyard recalls being unceremoniously dumped … through a text message. Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer’s relationship reportedly also ended this way, and one of this season’s “Bachelor” contestants recounted on-air how her ex-boyfriend had sent her a text welcoming her to “Dumpsville.” It appears that Appleyard’s digital breakup is far from unique. In fact, a new survey conducted by mobile phone site Recombu.com says that one in 10 people have been dumped via text, reported Digital Journal. The survey of 2,000-people also indicated that one-third of individuals in relationships say they’ve snooped in their partner’s inbox, and 25 percent of people confessed to using texts to illicitly flirt with people other than their partners.
Though Appleyard admits to flirtatious texting herself, she says she generally views the text message as a lazy way to communicate with another person — especially someone that you’re involved with romantically. “The text is the pygmy of communication methods. It’s a Post-it note, a P.S. It’s minimum investment, minimum effort. It’s often cowardly — a way to avoid face-to-face contact,” she writes.
The piece asks a question many others have posed: Is technology eroding our relationships? According to the editor of Recombu.com, Hannah Bouckley, it isn’t — it’s merely reproducing behavior that existed before the era of texting and making it easier. As she told The Daily Mail:
It is easier to write a few words and then send it through a text and avoid confrontation … Texting is such a part of how we communicate as a whole now that it is natural that this will be used for something [relationship related].
While technology has certainly made it easier to avoid face-to-face confrontation and communication — often to the detriment of relationships — the news isn’t all bad. In some situations, texting can actually enhance romance. Eleven percent of people surveyed by Recombu.com said that they’d been asked out via text message, and some experts say that sexy texting can actually benefit a sexual relationship.
In the book “Firtexting,” authors Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz contend that “sexting,” the exchange of sexually explicit words and images via text, as well as less explicit flirtatious texting, has the power to enhance couples’ sexual connection. “When you’ve been with the same person for a while, what better way to spice up your relationship than with a fiery flirtext?” wrote Goldstein and Baniuszewicz. They also assert that couples can express sexual desires that through technology that they may not be discussing face-to-face.
Have you ever used texting to end, begin or spice up a relationship? Do you think technology is helping or hurting our romantic encounters?
I read a number of blogs each day (I have no Facebook which means I have time to do that), and it is a common problem people speak of how technology takes away the emotion and meaning from life. You attempts to reduce exposure to enslaving technology is good.
Like so much in life, it’s okay when done in moderation. I think the picture you used pretty much shows what our obsession with electronics is all about.
I’m not really involved in the electronic “revolution” because I’m not into gimmicks, gadgets, or new things. I have a laptop and a “dumb” cellphone and that is about it for both me and my husband.
I use Facebook and Twitter because I’m wanting to get my name out there for when my book is published. For me, nothing takes the place of person to person, face to face communication. I don’t see anything wrong with any of it, as long as it’s not being used in place of personal contact. Of course, this is only my opinion.
I never go on Facebook anymore. It’s kind of confusing to me the constant updating from moment to moment. For me it’s too much information, but I blog so could be accused of the same I suppose.
really helping me connect with people, get feedback, share my writing, get opinions, and keep in touch with family.
Think technology has very little to do with romance. I do think you can use it tyo stay in frequent touch but nothing can beat one on one conversation and the feel of skin on skin
To be honest, I like your commentary on moderation.
They say that there is no such thing as too much when it comes to good things. I think “they” talk too much!
The things that bother me the most about texting don’t have as much to do with the act itself as with the things that are often being ignored WHILE other people text. I’ve just seen too many people trying to text and walk down the NYC streets at the same time not to get completely irate, especially when they slow down in front of me. Not only is it rude, but it’s the kind of thing that can get you mugged if you’re not paying attention.
ON the other hand, I can’t lie. When I HAD a smartphone, I was hooked. I would not text in the street, but I would often text in restaurants and in the park while sitting on the park bench. That’s weird enough for me.
And I do BLOG, as you know. And I Facebook, though I admit that FB has lost a lot of its luster for me because I can’t stand the daily drama so many others feel the need to broadcast. I hardly post anymore because I don’t want to become one of the whining masses. If I have something to say about something particularly important, I blog. If anyone wants to read it, they can. But they can always choose to stay away. I try to blog about things that really matter too, such as my big picture impressions of the world, or my writing. I’m not against sharing with the rest of the world, I just want it to be meaningful.
And Now I’ve babbled at you long enough. Thanks for reading 😉
I think technology is definitely changing the way we relate – I think we so easily succumb to the lure of wanting to feel connected to everyone while remaining safe and at a distance. You’re right about moderation…it’s not technology itself that’s the problem.
And I don’t understand anyone dumping (or asking out) someone via text. Lousy.
Diane-very funny as usual…good post….I blame my age but I struggle with the change from real life to e life on a daily basis. Written a couple posts (electronic Life 2.0 etc)…if you’d like you can check ’em out here… http://randomwritesandrongs.wordpress.com/
It’s my kinder gentler blog lol
I have to steal that Facebook snort photo!
Anyway, I remember how addicted to technology I used to be. Withdrawals from my addiction were hard, but human interactions are a much better addiction. Those endorphins flow in my blood stream, and I am no longer feeling lonely.
Bella: I have a problem sleeping because I wonder what is happening in blog world.
DiDi: Once I know my yard is safe I fall asleep. I’ll worry about the blog in the morning 🙂
It is very encouraging to see you assessing what is appropriate technology and internet usage for you and your own life. Hooray! As for me, with my residual facial damage from surviving a murder attempt years ago, online communications, editing, collaborating, creating, and promoting the causes about which I am passionate is SUCH a God-send. Nobody has to see or hear me! What freedom for me!
I struggle at times with the idea that I must be missing something when I am not online. I balance this out by focusing on the people that I love and remembering that I owe my time and attention to them first and foremost
my buddies and I text each other while we are having lunch, around the same table 😦