Day 92 Question 92:
In what ways has technology changed you?
So I was originally going to answer this question yesterday but yesterday ended up being this crazy cluster-f**k of chaos and I needed to write about that. This question stirred in my mind though and I knew I needed to answer it.
So, if you had a chance to read yesterdays entry (if not you really should because it’s juicy;) you know that my brand new computer pooped the bed. The hard drive completely crapped out. Luckily it is under warranty and luckily my old laptop is still functioning so I still have something to use while it is out for repair. I started thinking about how dependent on technology I have become. I am literally obsessed. I can sadly admit that I have an addiction. I feel lost without my laptop and my cell phone. Thinking that then re-reading it makes me feel pretty yucky….I mean I am not torturing myself with guilt or anything but I have come to realize how much human contact I have lost because of all of this technology (and I definitely know I am not alone in this).
Technology is a necessity…especially in this day and age (well at least in this country-in other countries it may not be something that people even really think about). We live in a society where computer knowledge is a must in order to advance. Communication with others is primarily done through text messaging. I have harped many times about how we are losing family values and relationships and human contact because of this boom in technology and I am a huge culprit that has yet to change my ways. I surf on Facebook for far too many hours a day. I have lengthy conversations with people via text. Honestly, the idea of picking up the phone and calling people almost seems awkward and uncomfortable….isn’t that crazy???? In 2000, I lived in upstate NY and was in college. I didn’t have a cell phone and I didn’t have my own personal computer….we all got through perfectly. We called each other on landlines or just stopped at each other’s apartments. Boy have times changed. I have friends that I absolutely adore but because we have spent so much time texting I feel a little bit strange thinking about picking up the phone to call them to talk.
In thinking about all of this I realized that this is another revelation of mine….I MUST STEP OUTSIDE OF MY COMFORT ZONE!!!! If I do not want to be guilty of this then I have to take the necessary steps. The one thing I loved about the “relationship” I had with the last guy I was dating is that he really wasn’t a texter…he preferred talking on the phone. It felt more natural to me and I felt more comfortable with myself and the entire situation. I feel that if I date someone I want to hear their voice….I do not want our entire conversation to happen through words on a tiny screen. We are unable to convey any sort of emotion that way. And how many times have you been completely lost in translation through this type of communication?
Don’t get me wrong…I don’t think technology is evil by any means. I guess it could be but if used properly then it can do so much good. For myself, I think (as sad as it sounds) that I have abused technology. I became a conformist when it comes to technology and I have followed the crowd….and I hate conforming!!!!
So, with this being said, I have decided to give myself a challenge. I will have to still use my laptop for school work and of course to continue with this blog but I am going to limit my time. I am going to allot myself only a small amount of time everyday for Facebook or other social media-esque sites. I will use the Internet for good….to learn more :0) I have also decided to limit my texting everyday. I cannot shut my phone off during the day in case my boss needed me for an emergency but I am going to try my hardest to shut my phone off every night from probably 7:30-10 and just spend that time with no technology (unless I have school work). I want to use my time for reading more and actually writing with a pen and paper. And where I am currently living the weather is beautiful 95% of the year…I want to be outside. There is no excuse not to be outside or doing things that bring me to a peaceful place. So starting today the challenge is on!
I wanted to include an interesting article I found on the subject as well (find it below). And btw…are you addicted to technology (honestly)?
Relationships And Technology: Is Texting Ruining Romance?
“Can’t do this anymore. It’s over. You’re a fantastic woman — but I’m not the man for you. Call me?”
This is the way that The Daily Mail’s Mandy Appleyard recalls being unceremoniously dumped … through a text message. Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer’s relationship reportedly also ended this way, and one of this season’s “Bachelor” contestants recounted on-air how her ex-boyfriend had sent her a text welcoming her to “Dumpsville.” It appears that Appleyard’s digital breakup is far from unique. In fact, a new survey conducted by mobile phone site Recombu.com says that one in 10 people have been dumped via text, reported Digital Journal. The survey of 2,000-people also indicated that one-third of individuals in relationships say they’ve snooped in their partner’s inbox, and 25 percent of people confessed to using texts to illicitly flirt with people other than their partners.
Though Appleyard admits to flirtatious texting herself, she says she generally views the text message as a lazy way to communicate with another person — especially someone that you’re involved with romantically. “The text is the pygmy of communication methods. It’s a Post-it note, a P.S. It’s minimum investment, minimum effort. It’s often cowardly — a way to avoid face-to-face contact,” she writes.
The piece asks a question many others have posed: Is technology eroding our relationships? According to the editor of Recombu.com, Hannah Bouckley, it isn’t — it’s merely reproducing behavior that existed before the era of texting and making it easier. As she told The Daily Mail:
It is easier to write a few words and then send it through a text and avoid confrontation … Texting is such a part of how we communicate as a whole now that it is natural that this will be used for something [relationship related].
While technology has certainly made it easier to avoid face-to-face confrontation and communication — often to the detriment of relationships — the news isn’t all bad. In some situations, texting can actually enhance romance. Eleven percent of people surveyed by Recombu.com said that they’d been asked out via text message, and some experts say that sexy texting can actually benefit a sexual relationship.
In the book “Firtexting,” authors Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz contend that “sexting,” the exchange of sexually explicit words and images via text, as well as less explicit flirtatious texting, has the power to enhance couples’ sexual connection. “When you’ve been with the same person for a while, what better way to spice up your relationship than with a fiery flirtext?” wrote Goldstein and Baniuszewicz. They also assert that couples can express sexual desires that through technology that they may not be discussing face-to-face.
Have you ever used texting to end, begin or spice up a relationship? Do you think technology is helping or hurting our romantic encounters?