Day 320 Question 320:

Why do we settle in life?

In life there are times we settle…whether it be with a significant other or with a job we really don’t like or even a place we don’t desire to live.  We settle sometimes because it seems there just aren’t any other appealing options.  We settle in moments of loneliness and moments of self-loathing and we settle out of laziness.  It may not be nice to hear but it is the truth and all of us have fallen guilty of it from time to time…some of us more than others.  We settle on believing that we aren’t good enough or smart enough or pretty enough….and come the end of the day these are all lies that we are telling ourselves.

I truly think we settle in life because so many of us are unaware that everything we do, say and feel in this life is a choice.  We are each molded by our environments and what we know….we act and react the way that we do because it is commonplace…it is the norm.  It is normal to feel sadness or anger but we can (whether you choose to believe it or not) change what we are feeling if we truly want to.  What it truly comes down to is accepting what we are feeling….accepting it for what it is and living in a natural state instead of fighting what we are feeling.  When we fight our natural feelings we are forming an unnecessary anger because we aren’t feeling what we want to be feeling…we are resisting the nature of ourselves….doesn’t this seem quite contradictory?  Life is complicated and confusing but very simple at the same time if we allow it to be.

I am at a stage in my life where I am still settling in some areas (and I am aware of it and working toward change…these are the areas in which I am slowly but surely stepping out of my comfort zone) but in some areas I will never settle again…or I will at least try my hardest not to.  We settle because of the constant buzz in our ear…..the continual pushing of everyone and everything telling us how we need to think and act.  We naturally get pulled into listening to the masses and ignoring what our inner self is telling us.  I am not saying this in a manner to insult anyone because I fall into it myself.  I just believe that this is the reason we sometimes settle….we see the masses do as they do and we tend to follow along with the norm because it feels comfortable.  We all hear day in and day out “Be yourself” but when you decide to finally do it we are criticized for being “weird” or “different” so we sometimes just do what we think is the right thing in order to avoid these ugly feelings.  This is what I mean when I am always saying that life is this great balancing act.  When we step outside of our comfort zones we can find that sometimes the feelings that result from it may be hurtful or painful….this does not mean that the battle is lost though.  I hope what I am saying makes sense.  I write as I do because I am facing my life for what it is and sometimes I need to see what has been challenging me.