Day 85 Question 85:

What makes you Laugh? What puts you into hysterics? How often do you laugh?

Laughter really is the best medicine.  I laugh in excess some days.  My boss at the restaurant (the owner) where I work is always telling the manager how much she loves my laugh and she loves how happy I always am.  I am one of those people that has a sort of “dry” sarcastic sense of humor…never insulting though….I absolutely know the boundaries.

There are so many things that can make me laugh.  A lot of the time my laughter stems from the way a person tells a story.  I love when people can tell a story and give it life.  They can build up every moment then just drop the bomb on you which causes you to keel over in fits of laughter.  I don’t know if this story will even be given the justice it deserves in written form but I will give it a shot.  A close friend of mine and I were having lunch one day (we worked in the same building) and we were trading stories about the college days and all of the crazy and stupid things we did in the past.  When my friend finished telling me the story I am about the share below I had tears streaming down my face and I was unable to catch my breath because I was laughing so hard.  The story itself is awful but the way she acted it out made it just that much better.  Now mind you, this story does include driving while impaired and I DO NOT condone that….it is a story though and this person knows very well now what a poor choice it was to drive in that state.  Just for the sake of the story I am going to call my friend Ann (that is not her real name).  Anyhooooo, here it goes:

Ann and her friend Melissa had been out one night in upstate NY (the usual weekend ritual) and they were invited to a house party out in the country.  They decided to head out there and while they were there they both did quite a bit of drinking and even smoked pot.  Both were feeling quite toasty.  Something happened (I can’t remember exactly what she told me) but they got kicked out of the party.  I think it was a lot of country “rednecks” and some words were thrown out…not quite sure.  Anyhow, as they were leaving the house they were debating between each other which one was less wasted to drive (again I do not condone drinking in driving and lessons have been learned).  My friend Ann decided to drive and her friend Melissa rode in the passenger seat.  They were 15-20 miles from home and while driving they realized that the gas light as on and they were in desperate need of gas.  They found a gas station and pulled in.  Ann got out of the car, went up to the pump and started to “pump gas”.  You will understand in a minute why I put that phrase in quotes.  While she was standing there her friend Melissa rolled down her window and they just hung there chatting and laughing about the events of the night.  About fifteen minutes had passes of them jabbering to each other when Ann took a look around.  She looked at her friend and said, “This gas station is closed.”  In her next breath she said, “It has been closed and abandoned for at least 15 years now.”  Ann and her friend had pulled into a gas station that had weeds grown up almost the same heights as the pump with windows busted out of the station itself and there were no lights on.  The only light there was, was that of the street light in front of the station.  The entire time she stood there, she had no idea she was not pumping any gas and absolutely nothing had happened.  She said it took them about 20 minutes to get their composure from going into such hysterics and they were so thankful that a cop never drove by because undoubtedly he would have known something was suspicious.  Again, I may not have done this story justice (and again I do not condone driving while impaired but it was a silly choice of young people-unfortunately I have done it myself).  When this story was told to me, it was told with such animation that I could picture everything so vividly and knowing my friend’s personality, I lost it and just burst into laughter.  People in the building were even walking by giving us strange looks because we were laughing so hard.

Laughter for me comes from animated stories or someone with that charismatic personality.  I could watch re-runs of Modern Family all day long strictly for the humor.  The show is made up of a cast that are absolutely genius.  Each actor/actress on the show is so skilled at their trade because their characters are believable and they all have personalities that exude humor.  They can capture an audience with their humor….especially Ty Burrell (in my opinion).  If you have not watched this show I would recommend you check it out on hulu or go by the boxsets because I guarantee it will bring a lot of laughter for you.

In my opinion, laughter is truly that instant vacation.  To me when you are able to enjoy that sincere, heart-felt laughter (not forced and awkward) it shows that you are vulnerable (in a good way) and you are completely comfortable in the moment.  When you laugh you learn more about yourself as a person and what kind of things you find humorous and who you are able to share the same humor with.

To bring a little humor and smiles into everyone’s day I thought I would cut and paste some funny jokes that I found.  We all need some down time and some time to lighten the burdens of life and just enjoy some good ole adult comedy.  I hope you enjoy :0)

The Hippie And the Nun (15)

 One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says “Hey guy I know how to get that nun to have sex with you…”

Naturally the hippie asks, and the bus driver tells him that every night at midnight the nun goes to an old graveyard to pray for God to forgive her for her past, and that he should dress up like God and tell the nun she will be forgiven if she has sex with you.

The hippie gives his thanks and runs to the nearest costume shop.

Later that evening the hippie gets ready for his big night and drives down to the graveyard and sees the nun praying, on her knees. He says “Behold, I have heard your prayers and you shall be forgiven if you have sex with me!”

The nun agrees but asks if they can have anal sex in order to keep her virginity. The hippie agrees and once they are finished the hippie jumps back and pulls off his mask and says “Surpise, its me the Hippie!”

The nun jumps up and pulls off her mask and says “Surprise, its me the bus driver!”

The Patient (15)

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour surgical procedure. A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath…

‘Nurse,’ he mumbles, from behind the mask “Are my testicles black?”

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies ‘I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body and feet.’

He struggles to ask again, ‘Nurse, are my testicles black?’

Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around.

Then, she takes a close look and says, ‘There’s nothing wrong with them, Sir !!’

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, ‘Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen very, very closely……

‘ A r e-m y-t e s t-r e s u l t s-b a c k ? ‘

Funny Questions

Why is ‘bra’ singular and ‘panties’ plural?

Why do you have to “put your two cents in”, but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going to?

What disease did cured ham originally have?

Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn’t he just buy dinner?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

What do you call a woman with one leg?

– Ilene

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your front porch?

– Matt

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool?

– Bob

What did the left nut say to the right nut?

The guy in the middle thinks he is so hard!

What do you call an anorexic with thrush?

A quarter pounder with cheese!

Why did the fish get kicked out of school?

Cause he was caught with seaweed.

WHAT DID THE GHOST SAY TO THE BEE?

BOO-BEE

Whats best about shagging Twenty – Eight year olds?

There is Twenty of them!

How to you make a dish washer into a snow blower?

Give the bitch a shovel

The fight we had last night was my fault,

my wife asked me what was on the TV and i said dust.

I also reccommend checking out these websites:

www.damnyouautocorrect.com

www.textsfromlastnight.com

www.peopleofwalmart.com